Two sides </3

22

I was hers.
She was mine.
She wanted to go.
But.
I didn’t want to share
I was never generous.
I tied her up.
She got off loose,
Leaving me with
no choice.
I slit her throat.
Saw her bleed.
She was mine.
She’ll always be mine..

*********************

I was never his
But.
He thought so.
I fought back
With all I had.
Not willing to relent.
He tied me up
In knots.
I cut them free.
He slit me throat
I bled in silence.
But
I was never his.
I will never be his..

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Little Girl in Me :)

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Emotions playing with my reasoning
A part of me know its ridiculous.
But the little girl in me
refuses to accept
Oh Oh Oh…
Dreaming of the impossible!
I smell trouble.
I continue to dream,
they make me happy,
like nothing ever did.
This is not
what or who I am.
I’m practical and sensible
Or so i thought…… *meh*
But nuh-uh….
Who am I fooling?
I’m a silly lil girl
Having those
Stupid lil crushes.. *blushes*
and that tooo….
On the very wrong person!!
Shades of pink,
all over my face.
Trembling lips,
no eye contact
and if I were to be more filmy
the “Dhak- Dhak” in my heart.. ^_^
But deeeeeep down, I know
*filmy,nostalgic face*
This is a biiiiiiig hugeeee
DREAM
and a dream it will remain….

Hope

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Pain and Pleasure
Both taught to me by you.
Pleasure by your presence
Pain by your absence.
Unknowingly,
A lot of lessons taught.
A lot more to learn, A lot more to teach.
Both I accept wholeheartedly.
I smile.I laugh.I cry.
I bleed.I scream.I cry.
“Serves you right” mocks the brain.
“Hope” mumbles the heart.
I sing a lullaby
Soothingly
For my broken heart.
My lil broken heart.

The confusion within

I wish I did not have to hide.
“Consider me normal the way I am”
My pleading eyes,
Is that too much to ask? ( I don’t think so)
Will they love me like they used to,
when they come to know?
They might, They might not.
That risk is one that I am never willing to take.
And hence my secret remains a secret…
The God I believe in, The religion I believe in
Curses my existence.
How does someone come into terms with that?
How do I go against my beliefs? My religion? ( Do I believe it anymore?)
And by embracing this, haven’t I already gone against it?
I have lost my way, gone against my “culture”, murmurs people.
Have I also gone against God? Is that even possible?!
I am also his creation. He created me.
Like this.
To this God I tell. To those people I tell.
I tried hard to stop what I feel… Really Really hard
The more I tried, the more I failed.
Ssssssshhhhhhh!!!!!!
I shushed what I felt. Acted dumb.
As I grew, I had to deal with it alone.
When I fell in love or lust or whatever,
I was ashamed…Nobody knew..
Left alone, with a deep dark secret,
in a world of familiar faces.
No memory as painful as that…
I wish I could come out to the world.
Loud and clear. About who I am.
And who I will be my whole life.
All I want is acceptance and peace.
All I want is to be me.

Who? Why? What? Where from?

Who are you? Why blogging? What do you get from it? Where am I from?

Questions that do not matter here. I do not want to be questioned.

This is my space. **My space**. Where I write. And talk. And express my views, thoughts and ideas with the world.

This is the place where I can be the “real” me . No lies. No secrets. No facades.

My bare soul. Presented as it is.